Becoming a parent is often a mix of joy and anxiety. New parents are the recipients of so much well-intended advice that knowing how to sift through all the guidance available and discern what information is valid and valuable can become its own source of stress. Navigating child care and preschool options is frequently one of the biggest stress points. As with many aspects of parenting, some of this anxiety stems from the confusing, conflicting, or even inaccurate information that tends to circulate in chat groups, in the media, and among parents on the playground. Stepping back to consider what your individual family needs are is an important first step in sifting the advice that’s useful from the advice that may not apply to your particular situation.

The first thing to think about is how much child care you will need and at what age. Will both parents in your family be heading back to work following parental leave? If so, you will likely need full- or part-time care, beginning when your baby is around 6-12 weeks old. Or, will a parent or other caregiver be staying at home with your child in the early months or years of their life? In that case, you may decide to wait until your child is two or three years old to enroll them in a preschool program. 

The answers to these questions will begin to inform, not only what kind of care is right for your child and family, but also when you need to begin exploring options and making a plan.

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Where should I start if I need to find care for my infant?

If you expect that you will need full- or part-time child care while your baby is still an infant, it is a good idea to begin exploring your options before your baby is born, so you have a care plan in place when your parental leave ends. If you are in New York City, you can start by exploring the NYC Child Care Map to identify programs in your neighborhood. Entering your child’s expected birth month and year will allow you to see the programs that begin in infancy. 

If you are hoping to hire an in-home caregiver for your baby, the US Nanny Association offers a step-by-step guide to finding and hiring a caregiver. There are also multiple services that can help you streamline the process and match you with a nanny who meets your family's needs. Talking to friends can also be extremely helpful in finding a trusted in-home caregiver, as many families support their caregivers in finding new positions when their own children begin school and no longer need full-day care.

In addition to traditional daycare and in-home care, there are also increasingly creative alternatives for parents who have some flexibility to work remotely but still need child care. For example, you might find that a co-working space with on-site childcare is the best way to balance your family’s return-to-work needs. In that case, options like WorkPlayce in Manhattan, Collective Kind in Brooklyn, or Bloom CC & Co in New Jersey may be the best way to find the balance you need.

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When do I need to begin considering preschools?

There are many myths that circulate among New York City parents about the school admissions process, and preschool is no exception! If you anticipate that you will want to transition your child from home or daycare to a preschool setting once they are two or three years old, you do not need to begin applying to preschools until the fall of the year prior to when your child will begin school for private programs and the winter for public programs. Many parents have heard through the grapevine that they need to begin applying to preschools as soon as their child is born or even earlier. This simply is not true, so take this worry off of your new-parent shoulders! 

Private preschools typically open their applications right after Labor Day for children who will have turned two or three by the following fall. Public 3-K and Pre-K applications typically open in January, and 2-K programs will likely follow a similar timeline, once they are expanded. The spring and summer is the ideal time to begin exploring private preschools, ahead of fall applications. The fall is the ideal time to begin exploring public preschool programs.

Throughout your journey as a parent, it is always best to focus on the needs of the child in front of you, rather than on an imagined child many years down the road. Your child will change, your life will change, and your needs as a family will change. It will be much easier to enjoy each phase of your child’s growth and development when you are not preoccupied with stress over things that are still too far down the road to predict or control.